Chapter 78: Blessings

Chapter 78: Blessings

Before The World Gehrman Sparrow could respond, Audrey, still seated upright, slowly spoke several more words:

“Heaviness…

“Stinging…

“Shame…”

Klein quietly listened until the end. He did not comment on Miss Justice’s words. Instead, in a gentle tone closer to Dwayne Dantès’s image, he asked, “Why did you suddenly want to do this kind of test?”

“It is not a test,” Justice Audrey said, shaking her head. “It is only presenting certain details I normally deliberately cover up and deliberately avoid, so that I can see clearly what the real me looks like in others’ eyes.”

After a pause, she moved the corners of her mouth without smiling and said, “After our last conversation, I really did try to formulate a plan. I intended to secretly perform some Manipulations so that nobles, merchants, the royal family, and the Churches would take out enough food.

“When it was only a matter of words, it sounded very easy. But when I actually tried to do it, I realized that I could not be as determined and decisive as I had imagined.

“Some of them are my uncle and aunt. Some are my cousins. Some are friends I have known since childhood. Some are elders who have always taken great care of me. Some are people I often meet at all kinds of banquets and charity events, who are quite friendly. They make up my childhood. They have given me so very much. They are part of my growth and carry my beautiful memories of the past…

“Furthermore, the food they have accumulated was not stolen. Their explanations, in truth, possess a certain reasonableness.

“To make them my targets just like that, to attempt to deprive them of part of their wealth—I truly cannot bring myself to do it. At least, not now.”

As she said those words, Audrey’s voice unconsciously grew louder, as though she were arguing with someone.

She immediately noticed that small loss of composure. After two seconds of silence, she continued, “Therefore, I want to recognize myself more deeply, strip away the warm illusion, and, under different gazes, ask myself what I truly want; whether my past thoughts were impulsiveness, hypocrisy, naivety, or a strong intention that came from the heart.”

At this point, Justice Audrey suddenly smiled.

“Although there is no result yet, the attempt itself has already brought some additional gains.

“I used to always believe that I had strictly followed the principle of ‘You are only acting.’ But only now do I realize that I almost became addicted to acting.

“Unlike other pathways, which require acting as different identities and occupations, part of the Audience pathway’s acting is completely integrated with one’s ordinary daily life. Sometimes, it is very difficult to distinguish.

“The simplest example is this: who does not wish to be loved by everyone? Therefore, when facing different people, I put on different personality masks. Using the abilities of the Audience pathway, I shape myself into the image that most matches the other party’s wishes. When this happens more and more, when one does this before every person, one has in fact already become addicted to acting and is close to losing oneself.”

Klein nodded gently.

“That is a very good gain.”

He did not evaluate Miss Justice’s earlier words.

Audrey was silent for a while. Then she slowly said, “During this period, I reread the East Borough investigation report my father previously had people conduct. I gained a different understanding of many things.

“Before the war, many poor people, workers, and farmers had already lived hard lives similar to today’s. They remained in hunger and pain for long periods. The revision of the Poor Law, mandatory regulations on working hours and environments, and the treatment of air pollution did bring some improvement, but only some…

“After the war ends, if—if we defeat the apocalypse, will similar things repeat themselves again?”

As she spoke, Audrey pressed her lips tightly together and fell silent.

Klein could sense Miss…